In-house trainingCoaching & Feedback Conversations

Coaching & Feedback Conversations: Say the Hard Thing Without Breaking Trust

Participants learn a simple structure for feedback and coaching that targets behaviour, protects the relationship and ends with an agreement. They leave with an SBI card, a conversation prep sheet and a coaching question list.

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Coaching & Feedback Conversations course cover
Key Outcomes
Describe behaviour, not character
e.g., "In Tuesday's meeting you interrupted twice, and the client stopped sharing"
Prepare the conversation
e.g., separate what happened, how each side feels, and what it means to the person
Coach with questions before telling
e.g., "What would you do differently next time?"
Agree and follow up
e.g., write down the agreed action and a check-in date

Why teams need this

Many managers put off hard feedback, then deliver it badly, with vague comments, personal criticism or too late. Feedback can also backfire: Kluger and DeNisi found that over a third of feedback interventions lowered performance. In Malaysia, where Asialink says people "prefer to avoid conflict", managers may avoid it altogether.

Two frameworks, combined
The Center for Creative Leadership's Situation-Behavior-Impact (observe only what you directly saw, and share the impact using "I"), and Difficult Conversations' three conversations: what happened, feelings and identity. Participants add GROW (Goal, Reality, Options, Will) for coaching.
Evidence on feedback
The Kluger and DeNisi meta-analysis (average effect d = .41, over a third negative) shows how feedback is given matters. A Zenger Folkman survey of about 2,700 respondents found 52.5% said negative feedback was more helpful to their careers and 47.5% said positive. The respondents were readers of an HBR blog, so treat it as indicative only.
Respectful directness
Participants practise being clear and kind in a culture where "avoid overt anger or confrontation" matters, including choosing a private setting and framing the issue as a shared problem.
Group work and role-play
Teams turn vague comments ("be more proactive") into SBI statements. Then they role-play giving feedback to a capable but defensive team member, and a GROW coaching conversation.

Exercises use real feedback situations from participants' own teams.

HRDC/HRDF training that builds confidence and drives growth.

Tell us what your team is facing. We will come back with a plan built around it.

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